Most days I feel like I am doing a pretty good job at this whole being a mum thing. I have a really great little baby and we have a lot of fun together.
But then there are days when I am sat in a room full of mums and I think my head is about to explode from information. I’m sat there, staring into thin air and starting to panic “f*ck am I supposed to be doing that?!” or “they can eat yoghurt!?”. I sometimes feel like everyone around me are having these insanely intelligent conversations and I am just sat there thinking how pretty the living room lamp is.
I get this huge mum guilt, and come home telling Sam about my day and how I feel like there are days I literally don’t know anything. But then, I look at my boy and he is the happiest little soul I could ever ask for. My mum guilt slowly vanishing as I look at him and listen to Sam telling me I’m a good mum and not to worry that I haven’t seen a dietician for my 7 month old baby…F*ck – I don’t even have a dietician and god knows there are many MANY days I need one, but I had no clue that this was even a service?! What ever happened to winging it?! Figuring out as you go on?
So I sit there, full of guilt that I am not doing enough for my child, frantically googling how to wean my baby properly, orÂ trying to find an Einstein group I can go to so he can learn Chinese by next week.
Catching myself, I realise I am definitely taking life too seriously.
My kid is great, he can roll around, laugh hysterically as I use my chin to aid the peekaboo toy he has, and he dances around with me as we listen to this weeks top 20 on MTV. He has fun. He eats well and is enjoying being a 7 month old baby.
There is almost TOO much information out there. TOO many people telling you what to do, or how to do something with your baby, that you become so incredibly focused on hitting milestones and forget to just have fun.Â So instead of worrying about whether he is going to get some kind of complex for not liking lumpy food, I think I will just continue with what I am doing and enjoy every single minute of my baby being a baby and not having to worry about anything.